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Have you ever wondered what in the world you are doing with life? Have you ever wanted to just give up and do something wacky and unconventional in life?

At every stage in life, we would look ahead at the next stage and think - "Ha, that's when I'll be happy and free. Free from the worries that I carry around, free from the life that I so dislike." Later when we do get there, reality strikes. There is the past that was so much better than the present. There is also the future that lures us on with promises of a life better than the present and the past.

When in school, final exams and assignments would be the dreaded things. Every day a drag in a crazy attempt to finish the homework and study for the upcoming exam. Every progress report an open invite for "parent" talk. College-life, with its impressively cool image, would appear to be the cure-all for all this. Fast-forward to college and exams aren't that important but the myths of the job market take their toll. Questions about what life might have in store and whether we can ever achieve anything take precedence. Dreams about a richly satisfying job and a fabulously independent life carry us through.

Finally, we do end up with a job that pays well. But where is the time to use the money? Delivery schedules and other pressures take the fun out of life. You lead a zombie-ish life. Deadbeat during the week and too lethargic to do anything on the weekends. Visions of a laid-back retired life in scenic surroundings fill our dreams and we march on like ants hoarding for the winter. By the time we make enough money to guarantee a trouble free rest-of-the-life, we would be old and shaken by the trauma of work pressure.

What we, however, do not notice are the moments of unhindered happiness that occurs to every one of us. The laughs we share with our friends and the dinners we shared with people. The beautiful sunsets that we are awed by. The cool water under a waterfall. There are a zillion and odd things that have made us smile and laugh.

There have been undeniably good times in our lives and they usually do balance out the bad days. But we never allow ourselves to be convinced that life is neutral. That the good balances the evil, the joys balance the sorrows. Ofcourse the happiness may be in short bursts - a few days or even a few seconds sometimes. The challange is to string these pieces together to look at them as a whole. Once we learn how to do that, our lives should be better.

P.S: I have no idea what got over me today!!

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